I recently purchased The Sims 3, mostly out of morbid curiosity. After playing nice for some time, I decided to try a Sim experiment of my own. It was over before I knew it, as most of the family was “gone” by the end of the week.
The unfortunate victims were Family McDork. I tried to make mom and dad polar opposites, so dad (Loser McDork) was a computer whiz while mom (Swirly McDork) was a technophobe. Dad was unflirty and mom was way too flirty. I also made dad a kleptomaniac and hydrophobic, and mom insane and inappropriate. Finally, both mom and dad disliked children. Their unfortunate baby (Babby McDork) was insane and excitable.
Also of interest is that Loser’s lifetime goal was to become a Creature-Robot Cross Breeder. Way cool.
Here is the family. Note the matching ugly shirts on Mom and Dad, and Dad's special bicycle helmet (click to enlarge):
Also note that dad hates his child and he thinks about it all the time.
Now it was time to make their house. I decided to go for a 'tripod' shape, with the important rooms situated in the three corners: Shower/study (1) in the north, kitchen (2) in the west, bedroom (3) in the east. A pool was located in the middle (4), so the three rooms were accessible only by jumping in and crossing. Perfect for daddy the hydrophobe. Lighting in the house was sparse, and what lighting existed was made to shine bright red. The carpets and walls were also red, just to make sure everyone felt good and aggressive. A healthy sprinkling of garden gnomes were placed throughout the house for décor. The toilet and sink were located outside by the front door (5), and this front area was fenced in with no gate to escape. A telescope was also placed outside, so they could look out at the world forlornly.
On day 1, they entered the home and Daddy the Hydrophobe jumped right into the pool without hesitation, got pissed off, and spent the rest of the day on the computer playing games. Mommy stuck Babby in a corner (just to the left of [4]) while she went off to dance in the bedroom, and then read a book outside on the toilet. Babby sat there staring at a wall until the evening, when it began to whine about being hungry and dirty. Everyone ignored Babby for the time being.
Day 2: Babby became loud and obnoxious. It was exhausted from not sleeping, it was getting really hungry, and it was stinkier than ever. Daddy the child-hater tried to put Babby to bed, but there was a pool in his way so he could not fathom a way to get to the crib. He picked up Babby and stood at the poolside, waving at the crib and complaining. Mom ignored them and swam to the kitchen for a drink.
The paper delivery girl refused to come near the house. She walked up to it once, heard the baby and daddy squealing, and ran away in terror. Henceforth she let the newspapers pile up on the lawn next to the sidewalk.
Days 3-5: Dad continued to stand at the poolside the entire time, still holding the Babby he hated, still trying to get it to it’s crib. Dad had to pee really badly, he was exhausted, he started to smell, he was extremely hungry… but like a trooper he stuck it out. For these three days, Mommy spent the time changing her clothes and jumping in and out of the pool, making sure every outfit got thoroughly soaked. In between her pool jumps (which only served to make her even more exhausted than she already was) she would pass out next to Daddy and Babby. This would only last for a few minutes because Dad and Babby were causing a ruckus. Both were screaming and flailing and totally miserable. After passing out 4 times and being woken up immediately afterwards, mom began yelling at her family and making fun of her husband’s hydrophobia. Husband was now feeling humiliated on top of everything else.
Day 5: In the late afternoon, a social worker came to take Babby away. Before leaving, though, the social worker decided to put on her bathing suit and stare at the pool for an hour. In the meantime, Daddy had somehow magically teleported out the side of the house, where he was free! With his newfound freedom, he proceeded to piss his pants, cry, then wander around the house looking for a way back in. I gave him a door that led into a small ledge by the pool (to the right of [4]), and removed the ladders from the pool. He walked in, I removed the door, and he stood there for some time just staring angrily at the water. The social worker and Babby were now gone, and mom and dad felt terrible for being such neglectful parents.
Days 6-8: Dad spent the entire time jumping off his tiny ledge into the pool, freaking out, then climbing out of the pool back onto his tiny ledge. Mom got back into her favorite routine of changing her clothes and jumping into the pool. Despite her feeling of shameful neglect, her filthiness, her exhaustion, her hunger, she was having a blast.
It got very repetitive so I started to take a video of them in fast motion. For the first 10 seconds, you can see dad jumping from ledge to pool over and over again. Mom had taken a break from her clothe-swap-swimming to pass out on the front lawn for a few minutes. Then she walks in and it looks like she is going to start pool jumping again… but tragedy strikes. Watch the rest of the video to see dad’s demise:
…
So now it’s just Mom left. All she does is stand there and sob, and sob, and emanate stink, and sob, and hunger, and sob, and wish for sleep, and sob and sob.
Costume pt. 2 As usual, I am good at starting things but not finishing them. Yes, the Fallout 3 costume was finished, but I never did get around to posting updates in here. Meh! I will do it now. Will update with descriptions later, for now here's just a crapload of photos.
I broke down. It has only been 24 weeks since my last post. This sounds like an introduction to an AA meeting... Hello. My name is Bianca, and I'm a recovering blogger. It has been 24 weeks since my last post.
(I originally spelled "blogger" as "blooger", FYI. Hehehe.)
Why am I posting so soon? Well, I am beginning to make a new costume, and for once I would like to keep track of the entire process.
The Video Games Live symphony orchestra thingamabobber is coming to my city. They are having a costume contest before the show begins, so of course I must do something. I originally was thinking of being a Beholder, because I was already going to make that for Halloween. However, that is more of a D&D type thing, and although they do appear in some games, I figured I should do something else. What about pacman? Nah, too obvious. Mario? EVERYONE WILL BE MARIO. Other ideas included a tetris shape, and Big Daddy (from Mass Effect), but those are too bulky and would not work for actually sitting in a seat and watching the show. Finally, I settled on a character from a new game that there probably won't be any music from, but is a fantastically awesomely fun game nontheless... I will be the wanderer from Fallout 3.
Fallout 3 is a set in an alternate post-apocalyptic world. World War 2 didn't end... instead, there was a massive nuclear fallout. Some people survived in vaults, advertised as survival shelters (but in actuality were used for various psychological experiments). Two hundred years have passed since the nuclear war. You play as someone from one of the "best" vaults: Vault 101. Nobody is ever supposed to leave this vault... they are born inside and they die inside. However, your father eventually escapes, and you are then forced to escape and try to track him down. The barren world that awaits you is full of mutants, radiation, and crazy people. Fun ensues.
As a wanderer, I will be wearing an Armored Vault 101 Jumpsuit. Here is a rear view (can't find any good front views)
I will also need lots of belts, some funky weapons, and of course, a Pip-Boy 3000. What is a pip-boy? It is a handy electronic device attached to your arm which provides you with details on your current state of health, keeps track of your inventory, and so forth. Here's the in-game view of a pip-boy:
As you can see, poor Albert here sustained massive trauma to his head and left leg (CRIPPLED). His other leg also isn’t doing too well! Below the main screen are three lights, one of which is lit up. This light indicates which screen you are in (in this case, stats). You can also look at your inventory (“items”), or go to “data” to check out maps, letters, tape recordings, and general intelligence you have gathered from wandering the world and talking to people/things. In the top left corner of the device is a Rad Meter, indicating how high your current radiation levels are. Too high and you get really reaalllly sick, etc. Below the rad meter is a dial that I think allows you to flip ‘pages’ within each screen (so, within the Stats screen to you look at your overall status as shown, or you can check out your skills, and so forth.) I say “I think” it lets you do this because maybe it is the rolodex thinger to the left of the screen that actually does this. Anyway, that is a pip-boy! My character will have an injured right arm and some head trauma (woo fake blood!)
Here is how I have begun so far:
Plastic bottles of various shapes and sizes (only one shown here), bottle lids, tape, foam, exacto knife, scissors, and some paint, to begin.
Start of rad meter: some paper and foam in a bottle cap. A needle will be added to indicate low-ish levels of radiation. The foam and cap will be painted, a plastic cover will be inserted, and some screws will be added for aesthetics.
The base of the pipboy is shown here, a 2L plastic bottle with a part of a square bottle on top. Foam encircles the inner rear portion for comfort / snugness.
Today I am going out to purchase more fancy thingies for my pip-boy, and I am expecting a pair of dark blue coveralls that I ordered to arrive at my house soon. More updates to come as they happen.
58 weeks since last post! Hah! I am getting good at this whole "post-on-livejournal-once-every-year-or-so" thing. My last post was made 35 weeks after the previous post. This post BEATS THAT RECORD! AHAHAHA I am made of win. 58 weeks, over 400 days. Amazing.
Ok, Now what to write? I am still living in the same place, with the same person, and things are going really well :) I am still in my M.A. program, pulling out my hair. I am still a humanoid female. What has changed in the past year? Car, some school stuffs, my outlook on life. LET US BEGIN THIS MAGICAL JOURNEY!
1. Car After using my mom's old Nissan for a short while, it decided to break down in many ways. Cars do this to me a lot. So I took back my old car which was originally to be sold for parts, as it was the lesser of two evils. I used it (when it worked) until very recently, when I bought a new car! Like, a NEW new car. Hurrah! It is such relief to have a car that will always start, one that I don't have to feel ashamed of driving. This is what it looks like: Oooh, pretty blue. It has AIR CONDITIONING, a first for me. It also has HEATED SEATS!!! I spoiled myself. I can think of no other place in the world where both the AC and the heated seats will be put to such immense amounts of use. Saskatchewan: Land of Extreme Temperatures.
2. School I am currently taking a stats course, and doing surprisingly well! Go figure! I guess taking three previous stats courses will help with that. Also, I recently submitted a draft of my research proposal to my supervisors, and will be defending the proposal before the end of the year. Then comes data collection/ data analysis/ hoping everything goes right/ writing my thesis/ graduating. Besides that, I am working on five other research projects (yikes), and have a COOL IDEA for a Ph.D. project. It involves stuffing cotton up peoples noses. I may be going elsewhere for my PhD; we will see how that goes. I have been in contact with some people at a university that is about 3 hours away; they seemed pretty interested in having me come aboard so that is very encouraging. I will be visiting them again this Friday, hopefully it goes as well as my last visit :) I have managed to secure a fantastic graduate fellowship for this year, which is awesome because it lets me pay the bills while focusing on research. Also, because of this fellowship, my supervisors are saving the money they were going to use to fund me for this year, and instead will be using that money to send me to a conference next summer in York, UK! Whee!
3. Outlook I feel like I have to include this category because I mentioned it. But I do not feel like saying much about it. Overall, reading over my past LJ entries, I noted a general downward trend in mood (ugh I am not writing a paper here, SPEAK ENGLISH, BIANCA!). Things have improved a lot since then; I am happier and have come to terms with a lot of things that had been dragging me down. However, I still have nightmares, like last night: I dreamed I had to kill someone with a hand drill in self defense. Hmm actually let me go into more detail, some things were funny now that I think about it:
I was in someone's house, and I think that this gang of people had poisoned a friend of mine and now were trying to poison me. I got so angry at this that I started throwing stuff all over the place. The gang just sat on a couch and calmly watched me as I smashed their TV, their VCR (haha!), a bunch of marbles, and just generally threw their furniture at them and through their walls. Then they let me smack their feet with this small chain, that was nice of them. I guess they knew they deserved it. Anyways at some point during all this I became a giant breaded shrimp, or at least was in a giant breaded shrimp costume. When I was done throwing shit and freaking out, I took off running because I knew they weren't going to take it anymore. I was horrified, oh crap I shouldn't have smacked their feet around! Now they really are determined to poison me! So as I am running in this shrimp costume, I am suddenly covered in a tasty coconut dipping sauce. Oh crap. Now they REALLLYYYY want to catch me, I am so tasty! Suddenly I was surrounded, and someone was trying to shove a needle full of poison into me. I grabbed a hand drill, quickly shoved a HUGE drillbit into the tip and then screwed a few holes into his head before he could kill me. I cannot emphasise how terrified I was. I woke up whimpering like a wuss, and I felt utterly exhausted, like I had just run a marathon. Thinking back though, hahahah I was a breaded shrimp covered in coconut sauce.
I think stress brings on the nightmares. There is just too much to do and so little time to do it... I feel guilty right now just for taking time out to type this up. Ah well, I know I can't work on projects all the time... even though you are not supposed to have a life as a grad student, you still have to take some off time to rest. Ok now to break up this wall of text with MOAR PICTARZZ! Oh, also, I got a haircut... chopped off a good 8+ inches... wow. And it is still shoulder length. Also, my life has been zombielicious over the past while, let me show you:
Above are some highschool students, me (3rd from the left), and Jared (far right); Jared organised a world-record breaking Thriller event. This photo is from one of our promotion events. We went to a high-school pep-rally and danced to Michael Jackson's thriller... below is a video of us dancing to the song with the students who learned it overnight:
My zombie costume on one day:
And on Halloween, with the Mighty D:
And on yet a different day, my zombie self discovered the joys of playing in leaves: This latter photo was taken after the Queen City Zombie Walk '08, yet another fantastically fun zombie event.
Oh and for the heck of it, here was my very green zombie self, back in March for a bday party: I would LOVE to include pics of my zombie friends but they are buried on a disc somewhere.
Ok now I am sick of talking about myself. I can see why I started doing this once a year.
35 weeks since last post! 35 weeks... thats like, 245 days. Hmm, I would have thought much longer ago. But yes. I just need something to distract myself/procastine with so... OK LETS DO ONE OF THESE SURVEY FUCKERS! Riiiight after this amusing comic:
[ When was the last time you.. ]
Smiled : A true smile? Huh.
Laughed : Good question. Oh, I was at work, waiting for a participant to finish this one test, so I was looking at webcomics and holy crap I saw the funniest thing and has to supress my laughter. A snort came out though.
Bought something : I bought a burger/glass of wine all for $2.50 at this graduate bbq thinger. Next purchase will be awesome headphones (yes, with built in vibrating subwoofers!)
Danced: Whenever the last time I wore my robot costume was.
Were sarcastic : I'm never sarcastic!
Talked to an ex : About a month ago?
Watched your favorite movie : Do I even have a fav movie? No idea.
Had a nightmare : Last night
Were lulled to sleep by the thought of someone: In a bad way? Boring way? Hmm, no clue actually.
[ A Last time for everything.. ]
Last book you read : Hmm, I think the 5th novel in Terry Goodkind's Sword of Truth series... I can't remember the name of the novel offhand.
Last movie you saw: The Simpsons Movie
Last song you heard: Ghost of Perdition - Opeth
Last thing you had to drink : strawberry banana milkshaaaakke, yay for blenders.
Last time you showered : Early afternoon today
Last thing you ate: Leftover pork cutlets, pasta and bruchetta (which I failed at today - made the bread a bit soggy, oh noes!)
[ Body ]
What do you most like about your body: It lets me do stuff
And least: The fact that it is perishable, maybe.
How many fillings do you have: Ummmm, a lot
Do other people often tell you that you're good looking: hahaha
Do you look like any celebrities: No idea
[ Fashion ]
Do you wear a watch : When I have a functional one that I haven't lost, yes.
How many coats and jackets do you own : hmm.. ummm...5-9 I would say. Wow.
Most expensive item of clothing : My transformer boots. woo!
What kind of shoes do you wear: Umm, well a variety. But they're usually black.
Describe your style in one word: Bianca
[ Friends ]
Who knows you best : Leith
What do they tend to be like : quirky sweetheart who likes cookies and rum!
How many people do you tell everything to: 2
[ Other ]
Favorite band ever: EVAARR??? I unno.
Most listend to bands: as of late they include Horrorpops, Devin Townsend (RE: ZILTOID!!!), Samael, others I can't think of
Do you find any musicians good-looking : they are horrendous people not worthy of being looked upon. HAR HAR!
Can you play an instrument : none with skill
Type of music listened to : Industrial, Metal (Prog, Power, Death, Viking, Doom, prolly some others)
Type never listened to : rap and country annoy me in general.
Favorite book: Whoa there.... umm... no idea
[ Religion ]
Do you detest religion : Not in general; some people need it and sometimes it can be helpful. Harmful, too, of course, but overall I do not detest it.
How do you think this universe was formed : THROUGH TIME! Wait, what?
If you were in a hostage situation, and you were given a choice, to either praise the demon they follow or die, what would you choose: I'll have to go with Ians answer: Uhh, well if this is literal then I would probably save face by pretending. I don't beleive in demons so what harm is there except for, you know, conceding and whatnot. I have no literacy skills at the moment, yo. Brain hampered.
[ General Questions ]
Whom do you believe is the smartest man alive at the moment: By what standards are we talking about here?
What do you prefer, a sunny or rainy day : rainy
Do you consider yourself lucky : hahaha
Do you feel pity for people who commit suicide : no.. compassion, empathy, even hurt... but not pity
Choose one word to describe how you feel most often: Lately, terrible. In general, xorgenblergish.
[ Stuff ]
Do you own any plaid clothing : Hmmm... No, no I don't think I do! Weird.
Do you own Converse shoes : no
Do you own Saucony shoes : no (that looked like 'sausage shoes' at first)
Do you own old school Nikes : no
Do you wear tight pants : no
Is there more than one zipper in your pants : yes
Do you know what a squatter flap is : If its a buttflap, yes. Otherwise, no.
Do you own a messenger bag : MSN IN BAG FORM?! Where the hell have I been? I bet it fails.
Do you wear your messenger bag across your chest : Eh?
Do you own braces: no
Are braces worn anywhere besides the mouth : yeah
Do you have short, shaggy hair : no.
Does your hairstyle exceed a height of 3 inches : when spiked, god yes
Would you classify your hair as a deadly weapon : see above
Do you think mohawks are "neat": trihawks rule
Is your hair black or red : i think so
Do you have a favorite brand of hair dye: no
Do you own a bandana : yea
Do you wear plugs in your ears: sometimes!
Are you amused by safety pins : indeed!
Have you ever used duct tape as a sewing substitute : yes, duct tape is a god
Do you own one or more objects with studs or spikes in them : yep
Do you own one or more articles of clothing from Dogpile, Lip Service, or Tiger of London: eh?
Do you enjoy leopard print: For a small bit of time I did
[ Habits/Beliefs ]
Are you disgruntled (having a general hate for everything) : noes
Do you dislike "preps" : Eh?
Do you dislike Hot Topic : naw
Do you smoke cigarettes : nope
Do you smoke cloves : WOE IS ME!!!! *crackle crackle*
Are you vegan/vegetarian: no I LOVE MEAT KTHXBYE
Do you think meat is murder : If we weren't supposed to eat animals then why are they made of meat?
Do your night time activites usually involve drunken underage vomiting: underaged? no. vomiting? not lately. Involve? yes. Do? absolutely.
Night time activities? weeping, procastinating, forgetting, playing games on computer
Have you ever slept in an alley or park : yes, on a bench too
Do you wash your hair less than once a week : no
Have you ever gone a week without a shower : not an entire week i dont think
Have you ever been avoided due to your odor : i hope so! I mean, not! I hope not!
Do you know who Jack Kerouac is : name rings a bell but I'll go with no at the moment
Do you like Mr. Kerouac : Uhh
Are you a member of the Makeout Club : eh?
Do you say "rad" : totally, thats so tubular.
[about me]
Name: Bianca
Do you like it: yes
Nicknames: Binky
Screen names: They vary.
Age : 23
Birthday : March 5
Sign : Pisces
Location : Regina
Natural hair colour : some form of blonde
Current hair color : Red, darker tips still from that black I had years ago.
Eye color : Blue
Height : 5' 1/2"
Birthplace : Somewhere in BC
shoe size : 6 1/2 or 7
[ Family ]
Parents: two of 'em
Siblings : No
Live with : Kalen
Favorite relative: I dont really know them well. My uncle Ballou was cool, I dont know his real name though, hehe...
[ Favorites ]
Number : 8.78
Color: red, black, blue, green
Day: Days when things seem tolerable. And Hallowe'en, mayhaps.
Month: october? march? august?
Song : i dont know, but the entire Ziltoid the Omniscient album by Devin Townsend is phenomenally awesome!
Movie: i dont know
Food: the yummy kind
Band : I DONT KNOW OK?!?! *twitch twitch*
Season : autumn
Sport : frisbee is tolerable
Class : Uhmm, well courses on brains and on cognition are cool.
Teacher : Oh boy, teachers. Uhhmmm, I can''t think of any of my teachers at the moment! For profs though, I like my supervisors, they rule.
Drink: Depends on the mood. Red/honey ales, a good shiraz, blood, orange juice, cho-mo...
Black other: what? this... wait... what?
Veggie : That woman in the wheelchair down the hall... *OHO! ZING!* *feels bad*
TV Show : Dexter and House are neat, but I havent watched TV in awhile now.
Radio Station : no thanks, unless it's community radio late at night
Store : Madame yes?
Animal : The ever-elusive potato walrus
Flower : Ones that don't smell like ass.
State : the blissful kind
[ This or That ]
Me/You : You?
Coke/pepsi : Umm... well, either if it has spiced rum or cherry whiskey to go with. Otherwise, none.
Day/night : Night usually, though lately days have been more.. umm.. easy on my 'delicate' mind.
Cd/cassette : CD
Dvd/vhs : DVD
Jeans/khakis : Die. Wait, jeans.
Car/truck : Car
Tall/short : Short!
Lunch/dinner : Lunch
Lipstick/Lipgloss : lipgloss
Silver/Gold : Silver
Alcohol/Weed : Alcohol
[ Love and Relationships ]
Do you have a crush : LAWL TEHREZ DIS GUY I LEIK BUTT TINGS R KRA-Z LAWL BBQ
How long was your longest relationship : 3 years
How long was your shortest relationship : a weekish
Do you miss anyone: Whitey, come back!! Arlan and Dane will always be missed.
whoa is that it? finally? the end? WOW! Took long enough eh? So other than that survey, what's new? Hmm. I'm in a Master's degree program now, for experimental/applied psychology (looking into braaiiiinnnsss and coooggnitioooonnn and alexithymiiiiia!)... Ummm... other stuff... ummm.... I have 2 jobs, both with the same prof, one is salary based and one is hourly (good wage!) AND I GOTTED some scholarships! They total over $11.5 K !!! Yowzers!
Probably more but meh. This is long enough. I leave you with a (hopefully) entertaining photo or two from my supper. I mean summer. Clickie to make biggie.
Emilie and me undulating in the fountain at the Unversity of Victoria:
I drew this on MSN and was told I was being too extreme:
Blueberry beeeeeer:
There's more on my other comp. Too lazy. Oh yeah, I have a laptop now too. Oh and don't mind my typos.
OMG #2 What is this crap? Two posts in a row? Anyways, here's some more unsubstantial junk for you to read:
Answer in one word:
1. Where is your cell phone?: Nonexistant
2. Your boyfriend/girlfriend? Kalen
3. Your hair?: purple
4. Your mother?: forehead
5. Your father?: woodworking
6. Your favorite thing?: laughter
7. Your dream last night?: garden-theivery
8. Your favorite drink?: juice
9. Your dream car?: functional
10. The room you're in?: bedroom
11. Your ex? gah
12. Your fear?: overanxiety
13. What do you want to be in 10 years? researcher
14. Who did you hang out with last night?: Kalen
15. What you're not?: graceful
16. Muffins?: yum
17. One of your current wish list items?: scholarships
18. Where is?: Nowhere
19. The last thing you did?: typed
20. What are you wearing? black
21. Your TV?: yonder
22. Your pet?: dead
23. Your computer?: upgradable
24. Your life?: busy
25. Your mood?: lethargic
27. What/who are you thinking about right now? pooping
28. Your car?: nissan
29. Your work?: university
30. Your summer? mine.
31. Your relationship status?: yes
32.Your favorite color?: umm...?
33. When is the last time you laughed?: today
34. Last time you cried?: yesterday
I leave you with this: check out clearification for a digital Demetri Martin rambling away, as well as some awesome video episodes. I sat there listening to him for a very long time and it rocked. DJ Intellectual Mitts, yo!
impromptu 'meet the family' I went to mom and dad's for Christmas. Here are some pictures. (We are the coolest!)
Also, their cats are cool. Especially Beasty, who thrives on being let into the shower: She seriously just stands there and meows until you let her in. Then she'll rub herself all over the floor and paw at the walls.
And then there's Weasel, who is very very timid but always poses for pictures:
Back to school in two days! I'm definitely looking forward to graduating this year, and I do want to get back to my thesis and plug away at that mofo for the next few months. I do not look forward to missing chunks of brain that will have liquefied and dripped from numerous orifices by the time I graduate. It will be the most hectic semester I have ever experienced. Thesis-izing, taking four heavy classes, work, and then halfway through the semester (when midterms are going strong, no less) I may be taking on a second job (also at the university). How will I ever find time for Zelda?!?!
Aaagh!!! *shudder* I am currently dying my hair with this mousse stuff that I have been using which works wonderfully and doesnt kill my hair. Yay! Anyways, I have placed a bag over my head to keep the dye off of the walls and chairs and other stuff I may bump my head into. The heat that is contained in this bag from my quite-warm head is making some of the mousse liquefy and drip down the back of my neck. It's a little eerie!
I no longer own that white Honda. It is being sold for parts. Instead I have taken over my moms 89 Nissan Centra, and she bought herself a new car today! Oooh! So yes, "new" car for me. What else is new? Hmmm.... I've been applying to grad schools. Or rather, I have been trying to gather up everything that I need in order to apply to grad schools. Almost there now, just gotta get everything into their respective packages and mail them off. Holy crapcakes there is a lot to do!
For christmas I got an awesome new computer chair. YOU KNEEL IN IT!!! On it? Much like the woman here:
Heh, it's pretty cool. anyways, I REALLY have to wash this dye/mousse/dripping crap out of my hair now.
I found this nifty project, to which I signed up three times. Basically, it's aim is to get a million people to sign up. Each person draws something in one square of this ginormous work of art. Donations are accepted, but you can sign up for free. Anyways, heres the three I made:
First of all, a self portrait (naturally):
Next, some sort of plant... thing...:
This last one incorporates my neighbours squares, so if you click on the image you'll go to the website and will see the surrounding squares (Zoom in to get a better look!).
I like the drawing software; it's simple but you can make awesome things, even with a shitty mouse like mine that *loves* to wander around the screen all by itself. Check it out!
First taste of madness Things have been very hectic lately. My life is fully that of "student", complete with no money, stress, and mushy brains. I just got back from Saskatoon to write one of my GRE's, so maybe now I can breathe for a day before tackling my finals.
Anyways, a few days ago, I had what I consider to be my first (and hopefully last) taste of true madness. I've had panic attacks before, experienced impending doom and blah blah, and those were terrifying times, but never had I *felt* crazy like I did that day. Looking back on it now I see how laughable the thoughts racing through my mind were, how ridiculous the whole thing was. But when it was happening, I was terrified. Here's what happened. I rushed into my French class, slightly late as usual due to having just come out of another class that was located all the way across campus. I sat down and pulled out my books and my (supposedly) freshly printed handouts that the prof had posted online for us. After organising myself I tuned in to the prof and tried to participate, repeating this and answering that. After a few minutes, a very strong feeling of deja vu washed over me, and directly after that, the professor asked the class something that I knew, without a doubt, she had asked before. My classmates didn't seem to realise this, they all had blank faces and had no clue what the prof was saying. My heart skipped a beat and I wondered why I was the only one who had heard this before. I then looked down at my "freshly printed" handouts and saw that there were notes written in their margins in my handwriting. I had no idea where they came from. The professor continued talking, again asking something else that I knew she had asked before, again with no recognition from anyone nor even from herself that it had been mentioned before. My heart was pounding by then, and I wondered, jokingly at first, if I was repeating a day that I had lived before. Right after this, the prof launched into the "new" material which I had just printed out, and I saw that the notes in the margins corresponded to everything that the prof was saying, and that's when I felt my sanity snap. I was living the same day again, I had been through this all before, how long would this keep going for!? This shouldn't be happening, this is ridiculous! Am I in some other dimension? Did I enter a time warp? I thought back to my previous class that day in which I had handed in my term paper, and recalled handing the paper in on other days as well. By then my heart was about to explode, I started having problems breathing, and I thought that this was all a sign that I was going to die. I then became convinced that I was reliving my last day of life, given a final chance to say goodbye. I jumped out of my seat, ran to the bathroom, and just cried and cried and wished that it wouldnt happen like this, not so young!
I eventually calmed down, forcing myself to try to reason things out instead of surrendering my mind to the very seductive throes of madness. Later that day when I was at home, I remembered that my "new" handouts, while indeed being new, had notes on them because late the night before I had looked up some things on the internet about the handouts. I had missed a previous french class and wanted to make sure that I was all caught up. I don't know why my memory failed me, why my mind kept this away from me until I was calm. I also don't know why I had such intense deja vu, and why for such an extended period of time. Usually deja vu is fleeting, mysterious but enjoyable. In any case, the deja vu set off an intense panic attack complete with delusions.
Yup, so that was that. Otherwise, I've been doing well. I'm kicking ass in classes (except french), and my robot costume now has a nice big round light source on the front. I think I'm going to go walk around in it for a bit; it's kind of fun and stress relieving in its own way.
Gas Mask'd! I bought a gas mask off of Ebay today for 99 cents (plus S&H, which is a good deal if you ask me). It's a "1977 old stock Belgian Gas Mask never opened" according to the description. Here's what it looks like:
Hell yeah!
School's still keeping me busy. I gave a presentation about my thesis not too long ago at a meeting, and soon will be presenting it for my other fellow thesis-izers. The thesis itself is coming along really well! I'm currently working on filling out forms in order to get ethical approval. YAY ETHICS! I'm still working at the university, its keeping me busy but pays damn well!
OH! AND! AND AND AND!!! QUADRUPLE AND!!!! I may be going to Edinburgh (yes... Scotland) this summer to present my thesis at an international coverence! I'd be doing a poster presentation, not an actual seminar thinger. And even if I submit my abstract too late, I may still be able to go for the sake of checking it out! WOO SCOTLAND! That would totally "roxxorz my boxxorz". I think it's a 3 day conference, but I'd stay an extra little while just to be a tourist.
Where is: my backpack. I sneezed while coughing and nearly blew my brains out. Lost in a haze of dulled senses, I stood up from my somewhat uncomfortable computer chair, realising it was past 10 am.
"When is my class. My class, when is it? 11:00? 11:30? Where is my dayplanner? In my backpack. Where is that?"
I stood there, mesmerised by the junk floating around the floor. Harmless junk mainly; pillows and clothing and blankets. There was a stapler in a bag and a water bottle that I had stepped on a few days ago.
"Not here"
I coughed and wheezed my way into the hallway, then stopped by the bathroom door. I needed to blow my nose, to dry the tears running uncontrollably from my eyes, to comfort my sick body with a wad of gentle toilet paper.
"No, my backpack. Where is it? Backpack."
I kept going and stumbled around the corner into the kitchen. My slow, deliberate footsteps were supported firmly by the cool linoleum floor, yeilding a pleasant tingling sensation in the soles of my feet. I bumped up against the fridge and knocked off a magnet.
"Forget it, find the backpack. When is class?"
I pushed onwards into the dining room. A bag of unopened pistachios was on the table. The nuts tempted me with their firm, slightly spread open shells and sweet edible insides.
"I should open those. I think I'm hungry. But backpack... class..."
I ignored the pistachios and turned into the livingroom. My blurry eyes desperately probed the darkened corners, hoping for some glimpse of my backpack. Nothing. I circled the room a few times, confused.
"My backpack. It should be here."
I went back into the kitchen, picking up the magnet I had knocked onto the floor. It was an orange jack-o-lantern. I smiled at it and placed it on the fridge door. Again I walked by the pistachios, again I was tempted. Finally I gave up and slothed back towards my room.
"Class. When?"
I stood in the doorway and surveyed my room. Something dark caught my eye. It was a pile of clothes, not my backpack. Disappointed, I half-fell onto the floor, pushing the junk around with my feet. A blanket was shoved aside and my backpack was revealed in a blaze of black, beautiful glory.
"Mnnrrgh."
I was annoyed; there was no need to get out of my room and search the apartment for something that was in my room all along. I should have looked harder. In any case, I opened it up and grabbed my dayplanner. Tuesday. Class at 11:30.
"That's still an hour away, I can make it"
I coughed some more, blew my nose, then sank into my worn out computer chair to type this out. Now I'm going back to bed. Screw class.
Sentimental This is unusual. I just got sentimental while listening to a song. Now, this song has no connections to anyone for me, so surely the lyrics must be so sweet that they are the reason why my heart went all soft and my eyes welled up with tears? Well, I'll leave that for you to decide... the song was Haunt Me by Wednesday 13
This Halloween I think that we should be together just for old time's sake I wanna hear you scream just like you used to when we were only thirteen
Now the candle's burning out and the pumpkin's rotting away I just want you here beside me on this lonesome Halloween day
Sitting in the dark, Drinking my own blood, and a voice, it whispers, "Hello my love"
Haunt me, haunt me like you used to, won't you scare me, oh Haunt me, haunt me like you used to, I love you best when you scare me to death
I'm laying in our bed with these tainted sheets pulled right over my head I'm singing all our favorite songs out loud and I'm hoping you can hear them somehow
Every word you said, it ricochets just like a bullet in my head I wish that you could see that our love is bringing out the dead in me
Aww, how sweet! Seriously... the entire CD is one that usually makes me laugh at it's fun absurdity, but for some reason that song, at the moment in time, made me cry. I blame it on the wretched sickness(es) that have been plaguing me for the past week. Surely they have weakened me in some pitiful way that explains this.
Current Mood: I R DED LOL WTF OMG Current Music:Wednesday 13 - Transylvania 90210
Oh emo... I thought I would share this little gem. Obviously the guy who wrote it wasn't being serious, but the replies that he got show that people (i.e., other emo kids) were serious. Hahaha... ok anyways here you go:
-------------------------------------------------------------------- March 19, 2006 7:54 AM # Listening To: 'Cute Without The E - Taking Back Sunday' Mood: Angstful
Diary, I'm never talking to my family ever again. This morning I asked my mom if we had any milk left, and she totally said 'yes, we do', and then AFTER I poured my cereal, I went to the fridge. And, diary, there was no milk. And then she was like, 'why are you crying? I think theres some long-life in the pantry...we can always get some more from the store... What are you doing with that knife, Riley? Riley, stop cutting yourself...'
And then, this afternoon, my dad walked in on me while I was putting on my sister's eyeliner, and he was like 'Why are you putting on eyeliner?'. Like, I need a reason? Like, what, I have to tell my parents why I do every little thing I do? He practically accused me of being gay. Which I'm not. I just sometimes like to make out with boys. And besides I need eyeliner because I have low cheekbones and a heart-shaped face...
I hate them sooooooooooooooooo much right now... I'm going to go take some pictures of myself crying near a dead tree down at the park... --------------------------------------------------------------------
You scored as Postmodernist. Postmodernism is the belief in complete open interpretation. You see the universe as a collection of information with varying ways of putting it together. There is no absolute truth for you; even the most hardened facts are open to interpretation. Meaning relies on context and even the language you use to describe things should be subject to analysis.
OMG NOOB Yes, 'tis my very first LJ entry. Love it! Caress it! Worship it!
Life's been somewhat hectic lately. (Side note: I just heard someone outside yell, in a voice dripping with sarcasm, "BYE HONEY! HAVE A GOOD TRIP! AAHAHAHAHAHAHA") I'm a research assistant for one of the profs at the university here, so that's been taking up the main chunk of my time lately. The study we're working on is looking at reading ability and interhemispheric integration. Mmm brains. I began as just an experimenter, running people through the various tasks and tests that are set up. Recently though, I've been asked if I wanted to take a deeper role; read the literature, provide feedback and ideas, etc. Yay! Yes, I accepted. Previously, after we had pretty much all the participants we needed, when came time for data organisation and analysis, we found out that pretty much all of the data was MISSING. The computer didn't properly record reaction times to one of the conditions. Agh! So now we are testing more people, analysing as we go, and are aiming for having the first draft of the article done by the 21st. Wow. Hurrah for publication! Boo for short time frame!
Ok, enough about that. What else is going on? Well, there is always the soap opera that has been going on for the last few months with my ex. He's a great guy in general, I mean no offense to him but... boy I wish I could tear into him. He sent me an absolutely degrading email out of the blue, and it upset me so badly that I spent the rest of that day puking. I have no idea how to respond to him. Actually, I have no desire to respond to him anymore. I respected him, but he's lost that.
Anything else? Hmm... last night I had some good friends over for chocolate fondue, mmm! They brought over their kitten, Edgar; lookie lookie! (Sorry the pics are SO HUGE!)
Above is Michelle and Edgar, he's so loved!
I love Edgar too!
Matt ate Edgar, but felt bad because Edgar is just too lovable, so he regurgitated the little guy.
Yes, more Edgar... now with uber-cool roommate, Aaron!
Alright, that's all I feel like writing for now. Ta ta!
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potatobanana's journal
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